“….and then Lori, that bitch, sat on his lap and wrapped her skanky arms around him and he did absolutely nothing…nothing! He just sat there like the ass that he is and did nothing.”
I heard every word. I was three tables over in Starbucks and I couldn’t help but overhear. I glanced over and I was surprised to see the person I was listening to was nearing 50. I couldn’t help but wonder if she realized how she was coming across.
If you are single and there are no prospects in sight, you are in the perfect position to take on a personal project. Ladies, we must learn to control what is coming out of our mouths. It is the perfect homework for control freaks every where, the one thing you CAN control is your speech!
Starting tomorrow, begin each day with this intention at the forefront of your mind: I intend to write my complaints down in detail instead of speaking them out loud. There are two steps here, one, acknowledge the things that are bugging you and two, write them down.
Don’t get trapped in the artificial positivity that goes along with Law of Attraction thinking. Let yourself be bugged. Write it down and then if you are a drama diva like me, create a burning ceremony and do it up right! Even if you just throw it away, at least it is coming up out of you and on to something neutral like a blank piece of paper. I like to use different colors of pens and sometimes I write conversationally as if an inner buddy is answering back.
Now Lori might actually be a lady of the evening but even if she is, do we need to talk about it? What if the words we speak radiate from us as surely as radio waves? Personally, that is exactly what I think happens. Wouldn’t it behoove us to choose carefully what we are broadcasting?
So, let’s get together here, ladies, and make some serious decisions. Yes, I am sure that people have been low down and no good including ex-boyfriends, ex-friends and ex-bosses, but retelling the story again and again and again doesn’t serve you. As long as you are in between guys, why not practice cutting complaining out of your day to day routine.
A pastor in the midwest started an anti-complaining campaign that has had a major impact. His suggestion is to put a rubber bracelet on one wrist and then switch wrists every time you catch yourself complaining. The goal is to wear the bracelet on the same wrist for thirty days.
Great idea! I love the plan. I would just add one element. Complain once a day on paper. Let yourself be ticked off at the inconveniences that frustrate you, the inefficiency that annoys you, the disrespect that angers you and the carelessness that infuriates you. What ever it is, write it out, every word.
Your opportunities for great dates and new connections will be dramatically impacted by this change in your routine. Most feel a change in a week. You can expect to be treated differently in subtle ways and you will attract small things like coupons from area restaurants, invitations, movie passes, things like that.
Can fine dining be far behind? Getting used to noticing the small but certain signs that our luck is changing is a necessary step. You want to be with someone permanently. You want someone around to fix a few things and to snuggle with on the couch. He wants that too and he is looking for you. Whining and complaining, no matter how deserving the offending party has been, is simply unattractive to a lot of decent guys and potential soul mates.
Are you up for the challenge? When you are sipping a great red wine at your favorite fine dining establishment instead of whining at Starbucks to your girlfriends, you will be glad you did!