Goose bumps are riding up and down my spine. My chest is buzzing with throbbing contractions that feel for all the world orgasmic. On my TiVo is James Durbin wailing on Uprising by Muse. I feel it in my body. Let me say that again. I feel that physical exhiliriation as if I were there. As if I were HIM.

Why is that such a big deal?

I am 58 and until four years ago, in the midst of cancer recovery, I discovered an entire family of physical feelings I never knew I had. During the David Cook season, I connected to the electricity of Idol. I thrilled with their courage. Young and poised beyond their years or my understanding, these performers moved me.

When the judges praised and acknowledged them for their gifts, their growth and their willingness to take the coaching and keep on trying, I cried over and over again. Never being much of a cryer, I couldn’t help the floods of tears that came over me while watching these kids receive validation for not only their talent, but their hard work honing it.

“Yo…Dawg.” Randy Jackson would start with week after week in his enthused cheerleading. I loved it! This season, Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez are even more inspiring as they honestly critique the contestants.  There is no doubt about the love the judges have for these kids.

I kept the 2008 home town episode for a full two years. When David Archeletta, David Cook and Ayisha went to their home towns and were loved by their whole communities I felt that electric pulse as if I were there. I believe that learning how to have that feeling literally saved my life.

Even now, tears come to my eyes and my whole upper body swells when I remember that episode when the contestants are overcome by all the love being extended to them.

I cried and cried and allowed the feeling to engage me, enchant me and captivate me. The physical experience in my chest began to come more regularly, so to speak. There is a pulse to it. It is very strong and moves me to tears. Because I watched that episode over and over I have trained my brain to respond. It takes just moments, not really, it takes a nano second to ‘move’ my emotions thinking of David Cook, head bowed, shoulders shaking as he stood in front of his fans.

Now, James Durbin inspires the same feeling and I love it. James, a young man challenged with Tourette’s and Asperger’s syndromes, a dad and husband and all of 21 years old thrills me to my toes in an electric experience that feels like being plugged in to a 1000 watt line.

Today I don’t take this feeling for granted. I have a good friend, a fellow Snow White in my Single Girl Profiling System, who has been in my orbit for three years. Both of us guarded, we flow in and out of connection with one another. In a recent phone conversation, I asked if she felt goose bumps when I used a particular phrase to describe an idea.

She surprised me by saying no.

It made me ultra aware of how far I have come. I never understood what magnetism is supposed to feel like in my body. No one could teach me this and believe me, I searched everywhere for the answer.

And even though getting sick wouldn’t have been my first choice, it did give me laser focus on one desire…..to live. You see I was not an American Idol fan before 2007.  I was mesmerized that year and tuned in to that great feeling whenever I could. Now I won’t miss it. I am in training. I want my body to feel that way as often as possible. Being in tune with whatever that is electric and makes everything seem possible.

All the work I have done in my mind and spirit has paid off and I am experiencing much success, but it is learning to plug my body into the loop that is changing everything. I am finding a new version of myself as I step out of mind habits of pain.

When you learn to produce that feeling of vicarious celebration for yourself, in your body whenever you feel like it, you will be irresistible.  Nothing is sexier than a seriously happy woman. 

Tune in to American Idol. I dare you to be uninspired. I dare you.

Speaking of which, I am going to rewind and watch James again right now!

Curious about Your Love Sabotage Style?  Check it out here:  http://EndLoveSabotage.com

I meet hundreds of single women who tell me their stories.

Many are shocked to find themselves still single at a certain age. Some hovering around 40 still want to have a baby. All sad and disappointed by their situation.  Love Sabotage?

Here are the Top Ten Things Single Women Are Not Aware of:

1. Nearly all of them express shock that my husband and I have moments of disconnection in our very good marriage.

2. Nearly all feel a partner will make them feel something they cannot feel from anyone else.

3. None realize that the bio-chemistry of pleasure feels the same whatever is stimulating it. A good concert, a tail wagging dog, a fantastic dining experience, the hug of a child, the affirmation of a job well done as well as a great partner are just a few of the life happenings that are pleasurable.

4. Nearly all are waiting for “The One” before they travel, move or or start a new career. Life is on hold and they are accepting that.

5. None of them are aware there is a part of them who loves being single and is very good at making sure that nothing changes that.

6. Few realize that self sabotage is really self protection.

7. Few know the strength of their true personal magnetism and the power they have to create a happier life.

8. Most are isolated and none are involved in philanthropy. Nothing grows a heart of love than serving with a charity you love!

9. Nearly all experienced a broken heart around the age of 13.

10. None feels how special they are exactly as they are.

Want to put an end to YOUR single status?  Start here:  http://EndLoveSabotage.com

I love when the snow finally starts to melt and beautiful greens of every hue begin to shine in the sun, the air warms up, parkas give over to sweaters and everyone is friendly….even the crabby ones! Maybe that is why LOVE and ROMANCE feel so very good in the Spring.

Not only do your senses have a huge influx of long absent sights and smells, which always improves your disposition, you attract more positive people into your life and your connection to others  intensifies. When I see Michelle and Barack holding hands and publicly declaring their bond, I don’t know about you but I WANT SOME OF THAT!

My husband and I are a great couple. I love and respect him more every day. However. Did you hear a ‘however’ coming? Well, here it is and it is a big one. However, when I choose TO HAVE A DEEPER AND MORE ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM, there is one little problem.  Me.

I have to open MY heart and allow MYSELF to go one more step toward intimacy. I have to adjust myself to LET MORE LOVE IN.

Yikes.

Wouldn’t it be nice if he could just read my mind! What if he could magically know exactly what I want and need from him and I never had to ask for anything! Ha! I have been practicing the “If He Loved Me, He Would Know How I Feel” belief for years, now that I look at it, I have been practicing that belief with everybody and I never knew it.

I WANT what Michelle has. I want to hold myself securely in ALL THAT I AM, cute little warts and all, and command the respect and devotion of not only my hubby, but of all  the people in my life. Imagine how YOUR life would change if you had the magnetism to motivate your man to risk the heartless press corps and hyper-critical public opinion and take YOU to the theatre. I don’t know about you but that is mighty impressive.

I want that. I WANT TO DRAMATICALLY INTENSIFY MY PERSONAL MAGNETISM TO MY HUSBAND.  I want to be IRRESISTABLE to him and attract his most loving and affectionate self!  In order to get there, I have to use parts of myself that are very underdeveloped.  Just like committing  to the gym, I am going to stretch, strengthen and build my inner resources so that I can fully express myself with ease and grace and STRENGTHEN THE POWERFUL ATTRACTION THAT BROUGHT US TOGETHER IN THE FIRST PLACE.

While I am in training, I know I may stumble a bit, step on some toes and mismanage an encounter or two awkwardly, but I am choosing to let myself be a beginner in all of this and move forward no matter what happens.  I have a picture of Michelle and Barack on my bathroom mirror.  I look at how HE looks at her and I steel my resolve and commitment to stir up MY soul mate magnetism and get me some of that!!!

Thanks Michelle!

Want to work with me while I work out?  Join the http://SoulMateMastermind.com and get the Michelle Effect for yourself!