Believe it or not, there is. There are more breakups in December than any other month of the year. Why? Who knows, maybe it is just that when people think of buying another gift for someone they don’t know as well as they thought they did, they choose to breakup instead.
Or maybe now that it is winter, there isn’t enough snuggling going on. Or maybe the cold weather enforced indoor time is shining a big fat light on the truth…no one is really happy and someone is tired of pretending.
For whatever reason, there are a lot of people looking forward to a lonely Christmas again this year. Are you one of them? If the Breakup Blues are drowning out the holiday music in your life, here are a few things you can do to rise above and get through the next few weeks gracefully.
1. Even though breakups are unavoidable, torturing yourself with dramatic over-reacting is not necessary. Trust a friend to be honest with you. Ask for a reality check. The fact is it was over. At some level you knew. Chances are your friends are dying to tell you to let go and move on.
2. Schedule a massage. Or at the very least, go to the area nail salon and get a pedicure while sitting in a full body massage chair. As you are being massaged, repeat this phrase to yourself: “Thank you, I love you, I’m sorry, Please forgive me.” Based on the Hawaiian healing tradition of ho’ono p’ono, these are the four things you LONG to hear from your former mate. Say them to yourself.
3. Find someone who needs you. Somewhere in your city is a charity you can support whole heartedly. Especially at times like this, it helps to find people who are struggling too. Even though your life sucks right now, the fact is, someone else has it worse. My husband and I love to volunteer at the cat shelter socializing the cats. Helping out with fund raising is another way to support animals.
4. Take a class. Motivate yourself or get a buddy to keep you honest and take a creative class through your area YMCA or Community College. Watercolor, ceramics, memoir writing…read through the catalogs and pick one. Any creative outlet will help you process the emotional energy spinning around inside you right now.
5. Burn Baby Burn. Get a pack of popsicle sticks from your area dollar store. Write out your feelings with a pen. One event per stick. Write until you have nothing more to say. Then, plan on a fire ceremony. Create a fire, in a safe place of course…I have a special pan just for burning, then burn the sticks.
Breakups are inevitable. There is no escape. When your breakup comes, don’t let it be any worse than it has to be. Take good care of you. Trust a friend to be real with you. Purpose to move on. You are worth it.